Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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