I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
