i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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