Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Randomize
