Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
