so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
