I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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