he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
