she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
