if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
