You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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