oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
