is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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