her vagine was all disorganized.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i believe in u and ur pee
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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