Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
