So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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