So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
