Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
of course. lets lasso hookers.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
