Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
