Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
