mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
