plz talk dirty to me
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
