clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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