you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
