Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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