In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
