Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
