Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Randomize
