I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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