you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
