I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
