his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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