im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Randomize
