Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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