just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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