yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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