we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
