All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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