her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
