i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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