dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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