I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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