The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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