Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
