I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
