it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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