I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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