I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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