yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
