8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
